these nearly empty rooms
like the first day
of a new year of school
or the first time
you thought about
kissing a boy

you have
romantic plans for
fresh beginnings
although you realize
there were moments
you were frightened
by the seconds just
before you walked through
the doors and sat
down at your assigned desk
or the seconds before
the inevitable impact
of his soft lips
as his face moved so
close to yours
you had to close
your eyes-

and there you are
with eyes wide open
dreaming in these
nearly empty rooms
full of possibilities

Close your eyes now, as you lay in the dark.
The force with which your mind can move a
thought may generate a lightening spark-
It is best to rest now. Let it rest now you've
given it enough time and been careful to nurture
the qualities you require meet a bright future.
Under your covers on your pillow so deep
Close your eyes now and let lightening sleep.

The fray comes nigh and I am not shaken.
The spinning thoughts cease and desist.
When the morning comes and I awaken,
all swords shall be sheathed by the mist.
A salubrious breath satiates my breast.
My muscles elongate and then retract.
Your heart could console my head upon your chest.
I am compelled to dream but not to act.
The time is not right, though it is fleeting.
My organic clock can has taken a beating.
Although no blood may now spill forth.
There are other ways to prove my worth.
Sand and salt and rock and clay,
create the earth upon which I stand.
And while I stand solidly against the fray.
I look for the solace found in your hand-
that I imagine softly slides across my cheek,
while I yearn to possess what it is you seek.

Please do not sit there so still the next time the winter wind blows.
Hypothermia can murder a Mastodon and in your sooth you know-
That you are not a creature of such massive size. Experience shows
you must not amble on to petrify but instead pick up the pace and run.
While it is also true that fear can freeze, Father Time shall not be stunned.
When the water of the world stagnates, pray for the rain to fall anew.
Noah saw the water alter- his thirst was not quenched by dew.

To my skin Ill apply a steel wool pad and scrub off the burr
that attached when I clung to a drowning tree. From the muck I stir ...
If I must bleed for my vigilance, this pain I shall outlast.
"You have no choice." says the voice. You cannot change the past.

He toddles and jams the
chocolate cookie into his
mouth. And then, after it
is sopping wet with saliva,
he smooshes the cookie
into the crevice of one of
those plastic noisy toys
that sing and shriek and
light up with blinking lights
to his delight.

The noisy toy does all
these things and more.
It even makes the chocolate
cookie more mushy and hence
more desirable.

He glugs the milk from the
sippy cup. So delicious as
it runs down his chin and
neck. And then, he moves along
to another plastic noisy toy
that sings and shrieks and
lights up with blinking lights
to his delight.

He makes a poop and takes
a nap, he chases a ball and says
"deeeahuhhh" which means:
"pick me up, I need a hug."

He takes a bath and wears
fleecy pajamas with built
in slippers and a long zipper
that zips from the ankle
on the rght foot up to his
neck. He gets another chocolate
cookie and moves to another
plastic toy that sings and shrieks
and lights up with blinking lights
to his delight.

Imagine if he were thirty-five?

while
his soft hands
interrogate
simply
please stay
entertain
relate to me
simply

Moving on is much easier when you know for sure
which direction you want to travel. Choosing is the chore.
When the second foot you possess follows your best foot first,
forward movement is the motion toward the better from the worst.

But still...

Still I drag one foot behind as though I caught it in the door.
It is as if the dragging foot fears what may be in store.
Sometimes there are cliches I use even though I say I won't.
Sometimes I choose the devil I know than run to the one I don't.

Perhaps one day my fear of devils will diminish from my mind
And once again I will trust my heart in love to that princely kind
of man that I imagined, existed "once upon a dream"-
Where rainbows dance, butterflies can talk, and faeries eat ice cream.

But common sense reminds me that devils and princes do not exist.
Life is full of characters and some will not be missed.
And in this life, that I live, it is known that never-the-less
the winning smile, and sparkling eyes, I am no princess.